Friday, February 20, 2009

Confessions Of An Anorexic Drama Queen

No, you haven't gone back in time. No, that last photo is not old. Yes, those are horrendous outfits.

La Lohan is back to her old ways which has every tabloid using the word "thin" coupled with one of the following words/phrases: painfully, dangerously, alarmingly, or so-two-years-ago.

I think what's alarming (that's so funny! I almost sound like I care) is that while that collarbone and skeletal frame has been paraded around before, I don't recall her face being quite so gaunt.

What I find so the-record's-stuck, is that when asked about her thin frame, Lindz responded with "I eat. I ate a Big Mac today." Right. Someone should let her know that thinking about eating a Big Mac is not actually eating a Big Mac. And why would she even eat that shite??? It'll just go through her like grass through a goose! She's also been blaming stress and working a lot. Working? When now?

Have another look. Hmmm....maybe she did eat a Big Mac. She totally has that glazed over Fat Trance that skinny people get when they eat anything more than 4 calories.


What's next? Driving drunk around the 90210, and crashing your "assistant's" car? No. Wait. We did that already.

6 comments:

  1. It's all cyclical.
    Lohan gets thins.
    Drugs?
    Lohan gets arrested.
    Again?
    Lohan does rehab.
    Again?

    The only difference is that this time it won't be as a nymphomaniac straight, but as a committed lesbian.

    See?
    It's a whole new Lohan!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm so over this bitch. It's so sad, because she's actually a pretty good actress.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Damn, that's just gross. Seriously gross. Give me the chunky lohan from Mean Girls any day!

    (although I see she hasn't lost her boobies for some reason...)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I bet she did eat a Big Mac. Note that she didn't claim to have DIGESTED a Big Mac. I think that look her in eyes is the post-purge bulimia haze. And it's clear to me that she has breast implants or her body would have quickly sucked them dry! The work she must be referring to is her appearances as a circus freak.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Maybe lesbianism is the answer to the obesity problem??

    ReplyDelete
  6. bob: my mistake! it IS different!

    mac: you think so? I think she jumped the shark after mean girls.

    cb: silicone doesn't lose weight, silly!

    pb: i never thought of that...purge haze.

    glen: hmm. nope, i can't do it. it's just not worth it.

    ReplyDelete

you better make this good.

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