Monday, July 27, 2009

Things I Know For Sure: The Stupid Lyrics Edition

Backstreet Boys, Quit Playing Games With My Heart

"Sometimes I wish that I could turn back time, impossible as it may seem."

MAY seem? Do the BB know something about time travel that we don't. Sorry, "boys" it IS impossible.

Enrique Igleasias, Do You Know

"Do you know what it feels like loving someone that’s in a rush to throw you away?
Do you know, do you know, do you know, do ya?
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one to know the lock on the door has changed?"

I know that happens...sometimes. So, I'm going to go ahead and say, NO, we don't know what it feels like when the locks have been all changed up. Dude...what the hell did you do!?

Shakira, Whatever, Whenever

"Lucky that my breasts are small and humble so you don't confuse them with mountains."

Just how big do the bubbies grow in Columbia?

Ooooooh, I see. Okay.

Mariah Carey, Obsessed

"Got you all fired up with your Napoleon complex.
See right through you like you’re bathin’ in Windex."

What? WHAT!?

That doesn't even make any sense!

I'd like to remind everyone that this woman is two years shy of her 40th birthday.

Girls Aloud, The Loving Kind

"Baby, if you find I'm not the loving kind,
I'll buy you flowers I'll pour you wine.
Do anything to change your mind.
I know you may be disinclined
to find the love you left behind."

Okay, girls...let me tell you something. If a dude thinks that you're not "the loving kind," it's going to take a lot more than pouring a glass of wine. And flowers? What is he a homo? Also, if you already recognize that he may be disinclined, why are you bothering, you needy wanker?


  1. I've always hated that "1000 miles" song lyric:

    if I could fall into the sky, do you think tome would pass us by?

    WTF?? How about using the cliche fall into your EYES instead? Makes more sense

  2. I am still trying to understand Mariah's. The only bathing in Windex reference that comes to mind is My Big Fat Greek Wedding, using it as a zit remover.

  3. all i can say with regards to the 'ping pong song' is that sometimes all you did was love someone that was incapable of sharing that love, receiving that love or returning that love

  4. I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


  5. hello lixue and welcome!

    glad you're enjoying the blog!


you better make this good.


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